Don’t Wait for Someone to Pick You
In Blog, encouragement 20 commentsAug 21
{There are things that get in the way of being used by God, and they are hurdles we must climb over. My next 3 blogs are dedicated to 3 things I feel get in the way most often, in the hopes that through it we will search our hearts, talk it out, pray through the struggle, and determine to get in the game.}
I sit with searching eyes, hoping the boy on the playground will forgive my shortcomings in kickball and pick me before the last.
He doesn’t, and I feel stupid. My young heart cracks a little from its first experience of not being chosen. It was long ago, yet it seems like yesterday.
It’s regretful…how being overlooked by another can shape our perception of worth.
And before we know it, we find that we have spent more than half of our life waving our hand fervently in the air with silent thoughts of oh, please pick me.
Please notice I am gifted.
Please believe I can play ball.
Please confirm my worth, take a chance on me, trust that I am usable.
And we forget that those we ask to choose us pale in comparison to the One who already has.
“You didn’t choose me. I chose you.” ~Jesus {John 15:16}
We know this, but we ignore it, handing power over to the daily choosers in front of us, believing they hold our potential. We wait on them, like playground picks in kickball, to choose us to get in the game — serve, minister, influence, love. And we waste precious time when we do.
Because we have been chosen by the Great One to do great things. Anyone else who chooses us matters far less. The game is ready for us to get into. It’s only up to us.
My friends, even today may we...
Not wait to be validated by another.
Step out to do something for God, knowing He has already deemed us usable.
Never believe someone has to choose us before our life is able to do great things.
Someone already has.
*Conversation: Do you agree that one of the biggest hurdles for God using our life is us waiting on another to deem our gifts/talents worthy or usable?
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Oh Lisa, yes I agree because I have done the very thing and honestly at times find myself regressing to the same behavior. A She Speaks friend and I just had a conversation about this very thing…reminds me of a line from our pastor – “God says it, so that settles it.” He says I’m worthy, called, gifted, so why do I think someone else has to prove God right? I so want to get over this! Good stuff my friend!
Rather than sitting around waiting on another to confirm what God’s already said perhaps we should go first and then He’ll nudge others to use the gifts He’s given as well! Thanks for that advice by the way!
And you’ve taken the nudge, Jill…and look what God did. Love how you are seeing His choosing of you in a new way…and may it infect wonderful Cresco! One heart, girl. That’s it.
Yes, Lesa! I vacilate between wanting others to see me as valuable and fearing others expectations because I’m not sure I can live up to them. What a horrible jerky dance.
And yet, He coose me . . .a freeing thought.
Yes, Lesa! I vacilate between wanting others to see me as valuable and fearing others expectations because I’m not sure I can live up to them. What a horrible jerky dance.
And yet, He choose me . . .a freeing thought.
Yes. And I can relate…seems we are all more alike than what we know.
So true! I still feel the angst when waiting to see whose been chosen for the “girls night out” or “summer party”. But I won’t even dare to share my God sized dreams with anyone for fear of being told “You can’t do that!”. I believe I will wait on God for those kinds of choices. Thanks Lisa.
Friend, I’m so praying that God will bring us together as women to encourage each other’s dreams. May He give you an encourager for yours, even today!
Love this post, Lisa! For someone who battled insecurity and shyness most her life, it’s a truth I so often need to remind myself. Thank you.
Eileen…even those of us who don’t seem very shy battle this, too. So I relate.
amen!
we so easily drag that burden of hurt/pain from not being included/chosen way back in the day.
if we’re always waiting for someone else to give us affirming words, we’ll never fully experience being loved by Him!
Yes, Linda. Truth!
Lisa;
I agree with you on this as I spent the first 51 years of my life seeking my earthly father’s approval of my work and efforts. To this day, I still miss his mark.
As I look back over my life (I will be 52 in a couple of weeks), I realize that God set me apart for the ministry of healing to other women who have struggled to earn permission from others to be worthy, acceptable and beautiful. We are bombarded my other’s expectations of how we should be, look, feel and believe. Following God, which goes against the world, is and has been the hardest thing to do.
I have spent the past two years working to get my business/ministry off the grown because I have been struggling with comparison, doubt/unbelief, fear and worry of missing “the” mark which = financial success (there is no other standard). I have been so frustrated and discouraged even though I know I am called to serve God in this way.
Lately, I have been hearing, “Follow Me,” and am trying to do my best in laying aside the distractions so I can hear God’s instruction. In this world, there is always a plan of action for success. We are told to make a way and if someone else can do it, so can we. When following God, the plan has to be His and it may take some time or a lot of time before His plan is revealed and we have His permission to move ahead. My current challenge is, “God what is the next step?”
Thanks for this post, Lisa. I read it first thing this morning, but it broke my heart so I had to come back to it later. Thanks for the challenge and for breaking off more of the lies of this world.
Monica
Thank you for sharing this, Monica. I love how much we learn as we get older in our relationship with God. Truly, He brings such peace and wisdom. With you, friend!
One of my biggest struggles is expecting to know when God is using me. Sometimes it’s clear but other times He’s doing something and we’re completely unaware. (Like in this instance: http://www.katieaxelson.com/being-used/)
Katie
So very true, Katie. Thank you for sharing.
I needed this Lisa, God’s perfect timing.
Grateful, Laurie.
As the daughter of a perfectionist, I can relate to the feeling of striving for someone else’s approval. I’ve been the one who would refused to do something because I knew I wouldn’t be the best…so much I missed out on…so many opportunites lost.
Through the years, I’ve worked to move past that feeling of always having to be perfect at everything I do. I’ve learned to embrace failure. Failure is proof that something was tried…it wasn’t done perfectly, but the attempt was made and things were learned…someone cared enough to risk failing.
Being perfect is no longer the struggle I seem to encounter. I don’t worry too much that others will think I’m not gifted enough or talented enough because frankly I’m not, but God is. It is the usable that has become the struggle.
“Step out to do something for God, knowing He has already deemed us usable.”
Due to circumstances of this life, I know there are many who would not be chosen by the church as their “poster child” or in some churches, even a viable member. I know there are many that feel accepted by God alone. I know there are many that feel misunderstood by others who do not mean to judge, but find it hard to wrap their heads around something they can’t seem to understand or a circumstance that is not their own. I know because I am one of these. Putting yourself out there is hard when it seems to expose you to judgment…judgment that can sometimes cut deep into the heart.
But, I realize that the church is made up of sinners like me. We are not perfect, but God is. He continues to show us His love as our example of how we should love one another.
“You didn’t choose me. I chose you.” ~ Jesus {John 15:16}
I believe in love because of Jesus. If there is no other way I am used in this life, I pray He uses me to spread His love…even if to just one. His love saved my life. His love gave me hope.
I hear this, Kari. His love saved my life, too, friend.
I have been praying about joining the worship team, but I worry that somewhere in my spirit is some kind of alternative motivation, like wanting attention for myself. I am beginning to suspect this is a lie from the enemy to keep me doing nothing. This post was just what I needed to think about serving in a different way. Thank you! God’s timing is always perfect.