When People Disappoint Us [and we disappoint them]

I disappointed someone this week.

She didn’t say it, but I didn’t need her to for me to know it.

And so goes one of the epic stories of life…disappointing and being disappointed.

Someone says they will and they don’t. 

Hoping to do that, be that, provide that for someone, but we won’t.

The truth is, our assumptions color everything.

And what we think about others is most often based on what we see, which is limited.

We want to be free to just be ourselves, but we want others to be better and somehow more together and make fewer mistakes and live up to our image and most of all, just never disappoint us.

But we will and so will they. It’s simple humanity.

And maybe if all of us keep these things in mind, we can more easily survive the big let downs of life when people disappoint us…receive a reprieve back when we disappoint them.

  1. We are all flawed. Period.  Sitting around the big table of life, the one thing all of us have in common is the reality of our imperfection/limits. So, please…always…pass the grace. You’ll need it, next.
  2. Our expectations are usually out of balance. Most of us are not great at holding people to a reasonable standard of conduct – we either expect them to be more than they can be or allow them a pass to be less.  We have to pray for balance.
  3. Disappointments don’t kill us.  Sometimes we are too owned by our disappointments. But they will only derail us, jade us, effect us in the long term if we let them. Let downs are a part of life.  From them, we choose to swim around in them or move on.

By allowing others the courtesy to be, at times, disappointing, we allow ourselves the same courtesy to, at times, disappoint.

Because we all will.


*Conversation: Tell me your survival story: how have YOU survived disappointment in the past?

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