3 Things to Ask Yourself When You Struggle With the Same Thing Over and Over Again

designI’m a professional quitter and I’m also a bulldog.  So, it’s official: I’m a walking paradox and don’t make sense.

I’m a bulldog about integrity.  I will scrap over people I love and don’t care if you share my feelings. I lose sleep over how to make wrong things in the world right.

But I’m also the Runaway Bride.  Don’t pin me in a corner or I’ll lose my mind trying to find a way out. If it means you might hurt my feelings, I’d rather just run far, far away.  I will quit you before you can quit me.

I realized not that long ago, that wanting to quit was a running theme of my life, and that it was something I was tired of struggling with.

So I decided to ask myself some hard questions to find out what was really going on so I could work on changing it:

  1. When you feel like you want to quit, what has just happened?
  2. When you don’t feel this way, what has changed?
  3. What part of God’s character do you not fully grasp to allow this struggle to continue?

The last question might at first seem out of place – what our struggle has to do with God.  But at the core of everything for the believer, it is always about our ultimate reliance on His character and the belief that He can help us change.

And like it or not, here’s the truth: when we struggle with the same thing over and over again, it’s a symptom that there is an issue not settled with God.

I realized that for me, the symptom of wanting to quit was most often tied to a feeling of inadequacy.  My strongest feelings of wanting to quit came when I wasn’t as successful as I wanted to be, something didn’t work out like I planned, or I didn’t get the human approval I was seeking. At the core, it was an issue of my lack of trust in God – to truly be sovereign and have my life in His hands…to know better than me…to always be enough.

What’s your struggle?

Call it by name.  Ask yourself the 3 hard questions.  Be sick of it enough to finally let it go.  Pray hard for it to change.

It can.

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